Bedlam

(a scene of uproar and confusion)

After moving my new bed frame into my new apartment, I owe:

My new landlords a socket set
My new roommate a glass
And Alec a million dollars plus a new truck topper/cover.

And when I say a million dollars, I mean it.

Let me start off by saying a couple things. First, I had been feeling
not very good all day on Sunday. I started to feel better and arranged
to pick up a bed frame I'd purchased. I thought, "This won't be fun,
but it won't be terrible." Second, I hate needing help. In my perfect
world, I would be entirely self-sufficient all the time.

However, I had already made Alec agree to help me. I did this by
subconsciously guilt-tripping him into proving he was masculine and a good person, too.

Problems encountered:

Football. It was on. Alec loves it, apparently. But it was interrupted
by the move. (This is when I began to feel guilty.)

Hugeness of bed. It was in 3 chunks of pieces; 2 of them huge.

Truck topper/cover. It made the confines of the truck bed too small
for the human bed to fit in.

SMASHED GLASS. Capitalized for emphasis, this was the first and
perhaps the most profound part of the debacle... We take the first big
piece to my apt. And, in a moment of acceleration, it slides back in the bed of the truck and breaks the window.

(This is when my guilt turned into absolute self-loathing for needing
help. Also, it starts to sink in that a favor done for me has resulted in a BROKEN VEHICLE. I lose it, a little.)

Finally, the first piece is moved. We paused to clean up the glass smatterings (which took 3 brooms & brushes, and 30 minutes) and to take the truck bed topper off (in
order that the rest of the bed will fit).

Broken socket set. I'm not kidding. I borrowed a socket set from my
new, couldn't-be-sweeter landlords. Within two minutes, some
combination of Alec and the truck had sheered part of it in half.
(This is when Alec gets a little upset, bringing my guilt to
previously unheard of levels. Keep in mind, the biggest parts of the
bed are still waiting to be picked up. I think to myself, if Alec
leaves now, which would be totally understandable, what is my game plan?).

Punctured hand. A shard of glass made its way into Alec's hand and he
consequently performed at home surgery.

Punctured (broken) glass. Alec picks up a glass to get some H2O. It falls and breaks. Of course. We look at each other in disbelief.

The rest of the bed. It weighed HUNDREDS of pounds (I'm really not exaggerating). And we finally get it to my apartment and begin moving it up the stairs. Yep, stairs. This ends up requiring a lot of buff-ness and also yelling.

Construction. The bed must be put together again.

4 HOURS later, it's all done.

Thank you, Alec, for your help. Thank you, God, for not letting us
drop the bed on our feet or faces, either of which would've been dashed to
smithereens.