A confession
At least once a day I have a strong urge to let go of everything - not in the healthy "I'm gonna put this is God's hands" way, but in the way of abandonment. Being attached or committed to anything makes me uneasy. It's like, stability makes me nervous. Quiet makes me uncomfortable. A moment of loneliness produces near-pain.
Then I look at the world. And it's seething with genuine pain, the kinds of wounds that prove the existence of evil in the fiber of our reality. It makes my self-centered moments of weakness look infantile. And it makes me wonder: What are our lives for? Am I filling mine up with unnecessary details and neglecting what's at the center? If, for even one moment, this world - another person, a promotion, a defeat - are the rudder of my emotions, something is wrong. If how I feel is most important to me, I have made myself a god, that is, something to be served. That's why I have to embrace the things that might cause me pain. But embrace them only for God's sake, not mine.
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About Me
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- Where to start? I LOVE the news. I also love to sang. I'm learning to not live according to my senses. There is something higher, after all. My family lives in the Middle East, which is by far my favorite region on the planet. I'm missin' it. And that's it. Wanna go to a foreign country to visit (temporarily or permanently)? I know I do.
1 comment:
Don't grow weary of doing good, the book says. But then, of course, we do grow weary. Just remember that it is all doing good for you.
I like looking at the photos you post, even though I'm already familiar with most of them. I also love your great group of friends. I love knowing that you have this great circle of friends supporting you out there and helping fill up your life.
You're my favorite girl in the world.
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